Coworker bullying should not be tolerated

March 10, 2019

Most people consider bullying to be an issue by managers toward employees.

However, that is not always the case. Frequently, co-workers are bullied by other co-workers of equal or even lesser rank.

Co-worker bullying occurs when a peer targets one or more colleagues by engaging in verbal abuse, humiliation, intimidation, disrespectful communications and even work sabotage.

Typically, the co-worker is a long-term employee who is empowered by management to engage in the behavior. The co-worker also might be intimidating management.

A friend confided in me recently about her experience in dealing with a co-worker bully.

She said her co-worker, another female, had been targeting her with disrespectful communication, disparaging and unnecessarily hateful comments about her work and appearance, and even withholding important information to enable her to perform her job.

My friend said the co-worker also gossips and spreads false rumors about her.

My friend, a 55-year-old, said she is humiliated to be treated this way, and embarrassed to admit she is experiencing such conduct given her age. She said she never expected when she started her new job to be targeted like this by another adult. She said she dreads going to work and feels helpless.

I asked her if she told anyone in management about the conduct. My friend said she thinks management is aware and even encourages the conduct. She said her peer, who she calls the “bully,” has been with the organization for decades and is untouchable.

This scenario occurs too frequently in the workplace. Long-tenured employees who are untouchable and continue to target other co-workers make their victims feel helpless.

Employers need to first communicate that conduct designed to humiliate, denigrate or embarrass another person will not be tolerated.

This includes not just overt yelling or berating, but more subtle behaviors such as undermining another person’s work, gossiping and/or spreading false rumors about the person, intentionally withholding information or refusing to assist as needed and/or ignoring or shunning another a co-worker.

I recall an example where a co-worker simply refused to speak to her peer, including not even communicating about important work issues during the day.

The employer became intimidated to address the conduct when the employee threatened to file a discrimination complaint against the co-worker. This caused conflict in the workplace for years.

Employers need to recognize the lost productivity and disruption that such conduct causes in the workplace.

While no law protects against workplace bullying, employees experiencing co-worker bullying are suffering from a hostile working environment — just not a legally protected one.

Their work environment is extremely disruptive and difficult. Many will experience such health issues as depression, anxiety, stress, panic attacks and high blood pressure.

Employers may notice that the employee who is being targeted will take more time off and may take short-term disability.

The target will start to tell friends, family and others about their co-worker bully and seek advice on how to handle even though they are extremely embarrassed that, as an adult, they are experiencing this at work.

The “bully” will take great pride knowing that he or she has accomplished the goal of affecting the target’s whole life.

After communicating acceptable conduct, employers must listen to the complaints of employees and avoid making assumptions that the allegations are untrue because they are made against a long-term employee.

They need to objectively investigate the complaint and recognize the difference between a mere co-worker disagreement or personality conflict and ongoing workplace bullying.

In doing so, employers should avoid blaming both employees when in fact, only one is to blame.

Unfortunately, employers too often ignore co-worker bullying, or downplay its impact, resulting in the bully continuing with the behaviors.

Workplace bullies never act in the best interest of the employer, so it is always surprising that employers fail to take action to stop the behavior.

Employees engaging in the bullying should be disciplined or terminated under the organization’s code of conduct or similar policies.